sex workshops | gift certificates | culture | press and media | français | home

how to use a butt plug

Butt plugs are a great way to explore anal sensations and anal play. Many people will also start playing with butt plugs as a way to gear up to having anal intercourse with a partner. If you're just starting to explore this kind of play we recommend reading our article on enjoying anal play which covers the basics. Once you're ready to start playing with your butt plug here are some tips on where to start.

start solo

Even if you're planning on using a butt plug with a partner, we recommend starting out on your own. This gives you the chance to explore and experiment with your new butt plug without any distractions (pleasant though they may be). Using a butt plug on your own is also important as it's the only way you'll be able to tell a partner how you want them to use it on you.

cleanliness before...

When you get your butt plug home be sure to wash it well before first use. Look it over carefully and check for tears, seams, or rough edges. Make sure you've read and understood the care instructions for the material your butt plug is made of.

keep yourself clean while getting dirty

Bacteria that live happily in the anus can cause major problems elsewhere, like the vagina, the mouth, the eyes. When you're playing with anal penetration you need to be careful not to touch other parts of your body (or things like your bottle of lube) with fingers or toys that have been inside your bum. We recommend using condoms on butt plugs and using gloves for your hands. This makes clean up much easier and faster, which lets you move on to other things.

don't forget the lube

You should use a good quality lubricant with all toys for penetration but this is especially true for butt plugs and other toys for anal penetration. The anus and rectum can tear and adding lubricant makes anal penetration both safer and more comfortable. When using the lube, squeeze some into your gloved hand and rub it along the shaft and tip of the butt plug. You will likely have to add more lube during sex play.

butt plug as main event

Start slowly using your butt plug for penetration. Remember not to force it in, but instead press it against your body and relax, breathe, and bare down a bit until you can feel your sphincter muscles relax and the butt plug slips in. Once you're inside, you can play with gently pushing the butt plug in and then letting it slip out. As you get more turned on and more relaxed you'll be able take more of the butt plug in, until you get to the point where it's in all the way and your sphincter muscles are around the neck of the plug.

learning to control your muscles

The first few times you use a butt plug it will likely slide out (or even come shooting out) when you let go of the base of the plug. As you get more comfortable anal penetration you can learn to control your muscles and keep the butt plug in. This won't always work (for example laughing and sneezing will both cause the plug to slip out whether you like it or not). Once you're comfortable taking the butt plug all the way in, you can start to play with control by allowing it to slip out a little, and then try to draw it back in. With time, practice, and increased comfort you can gain more control.

butt plug as side show

Once you can insert your plug all the way with comfort, and you have some control over it staying in, you can explore other sex acts while having a butt plug in place. Try masturbating to orgasm, or having sex with your partner. See what it feels like to massage your perineum, or stimulate other parts of your body while you've got your butt plug in place. Many people report that having an orgasm with a butt plug really increases the intensity of the orgasm and their body awareness during orgasm.

partner meet butt plug

The main drawback to using a butt plug as opposed to your own body is that you don't get the same immediate feedback loop. This means using butt plugs requires lots of communication if you're using it on a partner or letting a partner use one on you. If you're looking for a toy you can use for anal penetration with a partner, we recommend anal safe dildos instead of butt plugs. A much better way to use butt plugs with a partner is for one or both of you to have one in while having other kinds of partner sex. You can make putting the plug in part of sex, but once a plug is in, they're mostly meant to stay there, at least for a few minutes.

double penetration

A few people like to use butt plugs for double penetration. Double penetration is an activity that requires a lot of patience, lubricant, and protection if you're going to do it safely. For women it's important to remember not to transfer any fluids or material from the anus to the vagina. If you're interested in exploring double penetration we recommend reading about it first, and starting with small butt plugs.

bend over boyfriend

Since we opened over ten years ago we've noticed a significant trend of straight couples exploring male anal play. There are now several educational videos and books devoted to women penetrating their male partners (lovingly dubbed Bend Over Boyfriend). One extra hurdle for a lot of men is the psychological taboo around anal sex.


print this page

order help | contact us | store hours | privacy | TOS | sitemap |

Come As You Are on Facebook Come As You Are on Twitter Come As You Are on Yelp Come As You Are on Pinterest Come As You Are on Google+ Come As You Are on FourSquare Come As You Are on Flickr Come As You Are on YouTube Jane's Guide McAfee Secure site

Come As You Are | 493 Queen St W | Toronto, Canada | M5V 2B4 | 416.504.7934 or toll-free 1.888.504.7934 |

© 1997-2014 Come As You Are & CAYA Co-operative Ltd.