Newsletter No. 9: WINTER 1999

Introduction

Buying sex toys for other people is tough. In fact, sex toys are arguably
the hardest thing to buy for someone else (with the possible exception of
flatware; have you ever tried to pick flatware out for someone?). Anyway,
we thought, what with the holiday season fast approaching, and with all of
us here being innundated with requests to pick out vibrators for
girlfriends and dildos for boyfriends, it was time to create a guide to
holiday shopping (in three easy steps).

Step 1: Make a list. On your list have not only the people you need to buy
for, but budgets for each. There's nothing worse than
leaving a sex store having spent twice what you thought you would just
because you were confused by the thirty different kinds of butt plugs
available.

Step 2: For each person you are buying sex toys for, ask yourself these
questions:

Have they ever used a sex toy?
If so, did they talk about it? What kind of toy was it?
Are you going to be using this sex toy with this person? If so,
consider your own feelings about the toy you're considering.
If they've had toys before, are you looking to get them something along the
same lines, or are you looking down an entirely different street?
You can use tricks to getting clues to what someone wants - in the same way
that you'd find out what colour sweater they'd prefer or what CD they're
hankering for. Have any favourite sex acts, special sensations or toy
curiosities been revealed?

If it's a first time toy, we suggest erring on the side of caution: smaller
if it's for penetration; a softer buzz if it's a vibrator. A small, light
flogger might be a letdown to some, but more will just leave an expensive,
heftier one around unused to collect dust.

Step 3: When in doubt, ask. It's not that we're experts, but we've helped
thousands of people buy sex toys for other people. You won't have to cause
any embarrassment by asking for help among family members, and we don't
know your cousin Judy. We're no risk and immensely helpful.

special news

This past summer we welcomed two new workers at
COME AS YOU ARE. Carol Camper has a longtime involvement
in community activities, in particular, working as a sexual health
counsellor at Hassle Free Clinic for eight years. Lucy Costa has worked as
attendant for people with disabilities, and is currently also a student at
York University. Drop in and say, "hi"!

Want to find out about sex toys as part of a night (or afternoon) of
entertainment with your friends (or, god forbid, your co-workers)? Do you
want to make your selection in the comfort of your (or a friend's) home?
Well, home parties are an ideal way to join fun and cameraderie with the
always enjoyable activity of selecting your first (or next) vibrator or
other sex toy. Pilar Ramirez is now working in association with Come As You
Are and would be delighted to host your next sex toy party. All the great
products and service, at your doorstep. Just give us a call, 416-504-7934.

Not that we don't do this for the smile on your face, but it was also
gratifying to be voted best sex shop in Toronto's NOW Magazine's recent
reader poll. Thanks to all who voted, and to all of you who make selling
sex toys an ongoing pleasure.

workshops

EROTIC WRITING
Jan 31, Feb 7, 14 & 21    7:30-10:30 pm
A four-week course with Kathryn Payne that will focus on developing your
erotic voice and the unique skills to express it, through writing exercises
and discussion of participants' work. Cost is $45.

THE ETHICAL LOVER
March 15, 22 & 29     7:30 - 10:00 pm
Drawing from the bestselling book, The Ethical Slut, and principles of
negotiation and consent in responsible BDSM relationships, this three-week
workshop is a chance to explore with others ways to create rewarding sexual
relationships. For women only. Facilitated by Leanne Cusitar. Cost is $20.

SEX, SPIRIT & AROMATHERAPY
March 28     7:30 - 10:00 pm
A discussion on sexuality and aromatherapy. Find out about aphrodisiacs,
and how to create erotic massage oils and sensual atmospheres with
essential oils. With Nadine Artemis of Osmosis, Everyday Aromatherapy. Cost
is $20.

KAMA SUTRA
April 18, 25, May 2 & 9
7:30 - 10:00 pm
Combining lecture, discussion and practical components, this four-week
course will explore Kama Sutra through four areas: its historical context;
food & aphrodisiacs; sex (including homosexuality); and physical
environment. With Sudharshan Duraiyappah. Cost is $55.

FEMALE EJACULATION
June 6     7:30 - 10:00 pm
Returning with her popular seminar, Shannon Bell will discuss female
ejaculation from a historical and theoretical perspective, followed by an
overview of anatomy and technique, plus a demonstration. For women, and men
accompanied by a woman. Cost is $15.

Pre-registration is required for all workshops. Sliding scale is available.
For more info or to register, please call us at COME AS YOU ARE,
416-504-7934.

books

Gift-giving can be a time of extravagance, or a time of anxiety when the
totals on your gift lists exceed your budget. With this in mind, we're
offering up suggestions on books for a splurge or a few pennies (well,
under $15), as well as new titles that will burn up the bookshelves this
season.
Erotic art books top our list of delightful, precious items. Choose from
the lush, dreamy contemporary erotic photographs in Eros; tantalizing
fetish photography in Forms of Desire by Doris Kloster; startling veritÈ in
Voyeur; passionate lovers in Michael Rosen's Lust & Romance; or a
compilation of several photographers in Libido's Best. The Erotic Lives of
Women combines evocative photos with text for a fascinating glimpse into
the sexual realities of women around the world.
Eros   97.00  /  Voyeur   51.00
Forms of Desire   69.99
Lust & Romance   49.00
Libido's Best   60.00
Erotic Lives of Women   69.95
You don't need to spend a lot to put a smile on someone's face. Illustrated
Perfumed Garden, Sensual Aromatherapy and The Soul of Sex are for sale at a
fraction of the original price. CinÈmatique is a spicy radio drama-style
audiotape featuring lesbian scenarios; while Hypnotherapy is a guided
visualization sexual experience. Or try Juxtapoz's Erotica, an erotic art
magazine in its new, fifth volume.
Illustrated Perfumed Garden   14.99
Sensual Aromatherapy   9.99
The Soul of Sex   12.99
CinÈmatique (cassette)   14.95
Hypnotherapy (cassette)   14.95
Juxtapoz's Erotica   9.95
New titles for December include Hot & Bothered 2 and Best Lesbian Erotica
2000 for fans of high quality lesbian smut and Quickies 2 and Best Gay
Erotica 2000 for fans of the gay variety. The recently-published Full
Exposure offering Susie Bright's trademark wisdom and sass is a sure
winner.
Hot & Bothered 2  /  Quickies 2   14.95
Best Lesbian Erotica 2000   23.95
Best Gay Erotica 2000   23.95
Full Exposure   32.00

toys

For the person who has everything, these toys will provide a special
surprise. Classic toys are making a comeback with new
features. Explore new sensations with our selection listed below.
Our bestselling battery-powered vibrator has gone waterproof!  The
Waterproof Pocket Rocket has the same great Japanese
quality, compact size, powerful buzz, except that it's blue and fully
immersible in water. A perfect stocking stuffer for the weary
traveller or the girl on the go.
We're bringing in a classic toy for the holidays. With high power and a low
price, the Silver Bullet vibe is incredibly versatile and has been wowing
them for
generations.  This toy is specially priced until January 1. Critter vibes
are the basic silver bullet vibe surrounded by jelly rubber to create the
form of a frog or rabbit. The "body" provides a strong buzz, while the
flicker of the frog's tongue or rabbit's ears give a unique stimulation of
their own. Cute and versatile.
Looking for something for all those penetration lovers on your gift list?
Look no further than the Dali vibe. Surreal softness plus a strong buzz has
made this toy an instant bestseller in the store.
Another toy that we're bringing back is a sumptuous sensation toy from the
Toy Bag. The Excytor is a wood-handled paddle covered in leather on one
side and soft rabbit fur on the other - for those on your list who've been
naughty or nice. Paddles made by Crimson are another specialty item.
They're made locally using a variety of woods of worldwide origins and
their natural oil finish reveals the unique beauty of each one.
We've added a new lube to our shelves. Foreplay Lube
De-luxe is a water-based gel that lasts longer than any lube we've tried.
Thicker, and a little greasier than other brands, it's great for anyone
looking for a thicker, long lasting lubricant.
Waterproof Pocket Rocket   32.00
Silver Bullet vibe   10.00
Critter vibes   19.00
Dali vibe   26.00
The Excytor   95.00
Crimson paddles   75.00
Foreplay   2.25 oz.  11.00 / 9.5 oz.  26.00

videos

Videos hold a special place in our hearts as a vehicle of expression that
often includes a tense moment of debate, a guilty pleasure, a fight for
enjoyment. As more of us participate, becoming selective viewers, the more
porn will come to reflect our tastes. That's why when it comes to bringing
the conversation of porn out of the closet - what better way than giving a
video as a gift
The newest actress ringing our bells is Chloe. She's got an attitude that
makes us swoon. Two new videos feature her talents. Chloe's: What Makes You
Cum is
narrated by the star herself and features Chloe and her friends on a
raucous sex binge. Porn veritÈ at its best. Bend Over Boyfriend 2 is a
girl-penetrates-boy follow-up to the immensely successful original video -
with "more rockin' and less talkin'" this time around. We almost couldn't
recognize Chloe here without her porn star makeup and garb; but, her raw
energy, insatiability and aggression are unmistakable, if a little toned
down.
Chloe's: What Makes You Cum   40.00
Bend Over Boyfriend 2     65.00
We once again present the ever-popular three-packs. In a time of cold
weather and warm fireplaces, the packs offer a little bit of cheer for
everybody - from the porn newbie to the aficionado. Videos that offer heat,
excitement and are 100% coal free.
Expand your horizons with the Holiday Mixer pack. It's like the beer ads,
but with porn instead. We've selected one each of our best-selling
straight, gay, and
lesbian titles and voil‡ - something for everybody.
Our most popular director is now available in a pack of three. Solid
directing that people have come to rely on. Lush sets combined with
fabulous style make Andrew Blake a favourite.
Say it with us: Superstar! Stellar performances from the cream of the porn
world. A three-pack featuring Nina Hartley, Asia Carrera, Sunset Thomas,
and rising star Jenna Jameson. A showcase that will knock the wool socks
off.
Holiday Mixer Pack Gift Pack   72.00
Andrew Blake Gift Pack   72.00
Superstar Gift Pack   72.00