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Learn About Strap-On Harnesses

What is a Strap-On?

A strap-on, also called a strap-on harness or a dildo harness, is a sex toy that allows you to penetrate your partner with a dildo, without having to use your hands. A strap-on may strap around your hips, thigh, hand, or other body part, or it may be used to strap a dildo to a piece of furniture. Most strap-on harnesses are worn around the hips, and are used to hold a dildo in place at the front of the pelvis.

Strap-on harnesses are commonly used for various types of penetration, as well as gender expression, power play, and role-play. People of all genders and orientations can - and do - enjoy strapping on!


How To Choose a Strap-On

A great harness is one that fits well, feels good, and looks good! It’s all about finding a combination of style, size, and material that works for you. If possible, try on your dream harness before you buy it, to check for comfort and fit.


Style

Dildo harnesses come in a range of styles. We recommend aiming for a style that suits your needs, your partner’s needs, and also makes you feel sexy as hell. Check out the descriptions below to help you choose the best harness for you:

  • Jock-style harnesses have two adjustable straps - one that goes around each butt cheek. This style of harness tends to feel very secure and give the wearer lots of control.  Jock harnesses are also sometimes called two-strap harnesses, the texas two-strap, and jock style strap-ons.

  • G-string harnesses have a single strap that runs between the butt cheeks (which also provides a handy way to hold a dildo or plug in place for the pleasure of the wearer). This style of harness also allows the wearer to feel the weight and movement of the dildo more, but is not well suited to anyone who dislikes g-string style underwear.  G-string strap-on harnesses are also sometimes called thong-style strap-ons or one-strap harnesses.
  • Underwear harnesses typically come in brief and boxer-brief styles, and fit similarly to regular underwear.  These harnesses are typically not adjustable (with exceptions) and it is important to get a good snug fit.  If you need help with sizing, just let us know!

  • Body harnesses can be worn around a hand, thigh, chest, or other body part, and come in a range of materials. Thigh harnesses can be great fun, and are good for people with lower back pain, or pain in their hips.  

Most strap-on harnesses we stock will accommodate any flared base dildo up to 2" in diameter. For this reason, some harnesses feature a removable o-ring. The benefit of a harness with a removable ring is that you can swap it out for a different size in order to accommodate both very large and very small dildos.

Another style consideration is whether you want to accommodate a dildo with balls. Harnesses with floating o-rings tend to work best for this type of dildo.


Size

Depending on the style you’re looking for, most of our strap-on harnesses are available in multiple sizes.

If you’re in the market for a strap-on that’s worn around the hips, you’ll first want to determine the size of harness that’s likely to fit you best. Use a measuring tape to measure the circumference of your hips.

Next, compare your measurement to the sizing information listed on the product page. Each product description features a range of sizes, complete with measurements, allowing you to choose the dildo harness that is likely to fit you best. If you have any questions about sizing, feel free to contact us before placing your order.


Material

The material you choose for your harness matters! Some materials like nylon and neoprene are waterproof and exceptionally easy to clean, while harnesses made of leather require more delicate handling, but are often more durable and often come with lifetime warranties.

Many of our strap-ons are made of leather (like the Aslan Leather Jaguar Harness). These are by far the most durable harnesses available. With proper care, a leather harness will last many years.

Our vegan leather strap-ons (such as the Vegan Commando Harness) are made of rubber. These are a great option for folks who appreciate the aesthetics and durability of leather, but who prefer to avoid animal products.  Our rubber harnesses, like the Aslan Rubber Jock, are a snap to clean, and feel very different on the body. Rubber doesn't "breathe" the way that leather and other natural fabrics do, so do keep that in mind if you’re considering a rubber strap-on.

We carry a number of high-quality nylon / spandex harnesses, including the SpareParts Joque and Tomboi. These harnesses are stretchy and conform to the contours of the wearer’s body, while still providing a snug fit and a good amount of control.

Neoprene is stretchy, comfortable to wear, and easy to clean. If you’re looking for new or different ways to strap-on, check out our neoprene hand and thigh harnesses!

We carry some harnesses with straps made of nylon webbing. Both our Aslan Leather Simple Harness and our Velvet Strap-On Vibrating Harness are low-cost, lightweight, and still afford a fair bit of control and comfort. For people just starting to explore harness play, as well as those on a budget, nylon webbing can be a great option.


How To Use a Strap-On

Dildo harnesses are a great way of taking dildo play to a new level and of exploring sexual possibilities beyond what our bodies would generally let us do. As with all sex toys, there's no one right way to use a dildo harness, but if you've never used one before here are some basic tips on how to use a dildo harness.


Start Solo

We recommend wearing your strap-on by yourself a few times before using it with a partner. When you’re home alone, put on your harness and dildo and walk around! Try thrusting, dancing, sitting, and lying down. See what it feels like to have the harness on underneath your clothes, both with and without a dildo.


Find the Right Fit

Find the right position on your body for the dildo harness and adjust the straps so that they’re snug, but still comfortable. You want the harness to hold the dildo securely to your body, but you don't want it to feel restrictive or cut off circulation. Take note of the position of the buckles and straps, and when you take the harness off, only adjust the straps that need to be loosened in order to remove the harness. That way, the next time you go to wear it, you can save some time with the adjustment process and get busy!


Use a Condom

Unless you’re using your strap-on harness with a non-porous dildo you can boil or sterilize, you should always put a condom on your dildo when sharing, in order to keep the toy from absorbing or transmitting bacteria or infections. Using condoms is also a great way to make cleanup easier, and to extend the life of your toy. If you're going to use your dildo for anal as well as other types of penetration, make sure to use a fresh condom for each kind of play. For information about choosing a dildo for harness use, check out our Learn About Dildos article!


Establish a Feedback Loop

When strapping on, you won't have the same immediate feedback that you have when using fingers or other body parts to stimulate your partner’s body. This is because you don’t have the same type of sensation with a dildo, which can make it more difficult to tune in to what's going on for your partner. Pay lots of attention to your partner's non-verbal cues and make sure to ask them for plenty of verbal feedback every step of the way.


Keep It Lubed

Make sure to use plenty of lubricant with your dildo and, if you're going to be playing for a while, be prepared to add more lube! Pulling the dildo all the way out of your partner during sex can be distracting, so you may want to try adding lube while you’re playing! Of course, you can always make pulling out a part of the tease of the sex play, if that’s something you’re both into!  Be sure your lubricant is compatible with both your dildo and harness.  Most oil-based lubricants will damage rubber harnesses.


Add Some Extra Stimulation!

One of the great benefits of using a harness is that it leaves other parts of your body free to stimulate yourself or your partner. Try using your hands, arms, or other body parts to touch and stimulate the person you’re playing with. If you have a free hand, you can even use it to hold a vibrator against your partner’s sensitive bits!

If you're looking for a way to add a little extra fun for the wearer, you can try using a dildo with a textured base, like the Fuze Rebel. The texture helps provide friction and stimulation to the strap-on wearer's outer bits while they’re penetrating their partner.  Some harnesses - especially the ones from SpareParts and Sportsheets - have little pockets that will accommodate a one-touch power bullet style vibrator (or two!) for the pleasure of the wearer.  A vibrating cock ring can be added to any dildo to provide more stimulation too!


Thrusting Vs. Rubbing

Some folks who are penetrating a partner for the first time may think that what's called for is immediate and intense thrusting. In-and-out penetration is something many people enjoy, but others prefer the feel of having the dildo all the way inside their body while grinding their pelvis against their partner. Be sure to ask your partner what works best for them, and if you’re both into it, try mixing things up!


Double Dildo Harnesses

There are some harnesses designed to allow both the wearer and the receiver to be simultaneously penetrated by a double dildo. If this is something that you and your partner are interested in, you’ll want to ensure that the double dildo and harness you’re using are mutually compatible before you buy them. Usually, this means choosing a harness with an opening in the front panel that allows the dildo to fit through in both directions, as well as buying an asymmetrical double dildo. For more information about choosing a double dildo, check out our Learn About Dildos article!


Care and Cleaning

Leather: Wipe down the surface of the leather with a damp cloth and mild soap, and pat with a towel to dry. Once dry, if you’d like, you can treat your leather items with a leather conditioner to help prevent the material from drying out and cracking.

  • Vegan Leather: Wipe down the surface of the leather with a damp cloth and mild soap, and pat with a towel to dry.

  • Nylon / Spandex Blend: Machine wash in cold water with mild soap. Lay flat or tumble dry on low temperature.

  • Rubber: Clean by hand with water and mild soap. Hang to dry.

  • Neoprene: Machine wash in cold water with mild soap. Hang to dry.

  • Nylon webbing: Machine wash in cold water with mild soap. Hang to dry.