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Asking for a Friend: Sex Advice from Sex Nerds.

What soft, yet firm, and totally boilable?

Dearest Sex Nerds - My friend with benefits and I have a pretty vast collection of dildos and strap-ons that just aren't doing it for us. We're really into silicone toys because they're so easy to clean, but all of the ones we've invested in thus far have been as hard as rocks. Well, maybe not that hard, but they're all definitely on the firm side of soft. We've already sunk so much cash into this project (there's no good sex shops in our town, so we're only ever able to order dildos online) and I'm nervous investing more money...

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Is my sex toy absorbing lubricant? Where is my lube going?

Hi Nerds, Me and my partner are looking for a new lube and we're not sure where to start. We have a Fuze Silicone Tango that we love, but it dries out really fast when we're playing with it. We've started to use it with a condom plus a LOT of water-based lube both inside and outside the condom but the Tango seems to absorb all of the lubricant causing a ton of friction. The condom *seems* to help but we feel like there might be a better option. Is there a lube, or lube + condom combination that you...

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Sharing is caring, but should I be sharing my harness with my girlfriend?

Hey Nerds - I have a question that I've not been able to find a satisfactory answer to, and I'm hoping you'll be able to help! My favourite strap-on harness is an Aslan Leather harness that I've had for years now - it is so comfy, and so durable that I haven't even had to use my lifetime warranty ever though I've had it literally forever. The thing is, my girlfriend recently started using my harness too and it just occurred to me that it might be an issue in terms of STIs and stuff.  Are there safer sex practices that...

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Will my NYTC suction cup work with my Vixen friends?

Dear Nerds - I've recently fallen deeply in love with the double suction cups from New York Toy Collective! They work so well with all of my dildos - even the giant ones - and I can use them to stick my dildos to my shower wall. They're amazing. I can't even. I thought they might work with my Vixen Creations Vixskin friends, they with their sorry excuse for a suction cup, but those Vixen engineers cut the circle indent in the same 2.5” diameter as the suction cup, so it just won’t hold. I am considering adding to my Vixen...

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This vibe keeps coming between us!

Hi Sex Nerd - I've been seeing my new ladyfriend for a couple of weeks, and the sex we're having is just blowing my mind. Or more specifically, being with someone so naturally orgasmic is blowing my mind. She seems to really prefer sex when I wear my strap-on (the Fuze Foreman and Aslan Jaguar), which is awesome, but she also likes a lot of clitoral stimulation during sex and I'm finding I just can't do everything and be everywhere at once. We've been using her Hitachi Magic Wand sometimes, but it is kinda huge and just gets in the way...

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What's the deal with strapless strap-ons anyway?

Hi Sexy Nerds - My best friend (and wife) and I have been "pegging" for years now (thank you, Tristan Taormino!) and we've been thinking about switching over from a regular dildo-and-harness to a more of a strapless strap-on double dildo. I think we both find the harness stuff to be a bit fussy and love the idea of a sexy setup that requires less gear. Anyway, the problem is that while we love all of the toys we have from Fuze, my best friend (and wife) worries that they'll be too dense for double dildo play and she is...

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What's a sex-positive parent to do? Asking for my kid.

Howdy Fellow Sex Nerds! I'm not really asking for a friend, I'm asking for my kid. I mean, I guess my kid is my friend, but mostly he's my kid and I'm asking this as his dad. Anyhow, it recently came to our attention that my son has discovered, uh, erotic content on the internet. We didn't invade his privacy - me and his mom weren't spying on him or anything - but we did come across some awkward content in his browsing history. You folks have always been so great at providing answers to our questions about some of...

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Needing a binder for a friend in a bind!

Dear Nerds - My best friend is in a bit of a bind and I'm hoping you can help out! Basically, they just came out (to me) as non-binary, but they still live at home with their parents. They haven't told their parents yet - mostly because their dad is an english teacher, Jordan Peterson fanboy, and throws a fit at the mere suggestion of using "they" as a singular pronoun. On top of everything else, they're super broke and desperately need a binder to feel a little bit better about the whole situation. What is a friend to do?...

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How does a new senior spice up her life?

Dear Sex Nerds, I've recently retired and I'm thinking some sex toys might be just the thing to spice my life up a bit! I'm terribly uncomfortable with this entire oeuvre, but I'm really wanting to learn more. Where do I start? - Cougar Spice Hi Spice! Great question! You know, So, our advice will depend a bit on what you're looking for here.  A lot of folks start out with a vibrator, but some people are more interested in a vibrator for external use (say, for the clitoris or even the underside of a penis) and some folks are looking for something for internal...

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What exactly is a sex educator anyway?!?

Howdy Sex Nerds! I have been a big fan of your weird sex co-op forever and really love your approach to sexuality and sex toys. I am writing because I'm extremely interested in getting into the sex education industry. I have an overall fascination when it comes to sex and the role it has in relationships and I was wondering how to turn this love into a career. If you have any tips or advice, it would be greatly appreciated! - Wannabe Sexxxpert Heya Sexxxpert! Oh man, of all of the sex questions we've gotten over the past 20+ years...

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